Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
