Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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