I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
