SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
