I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
