Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Randomize