I just made out with a guy for $7.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
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