tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize