but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
