Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
