well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize