I'm really into asian looking animals
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize