Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
