i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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