I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
