he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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