Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize