She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
