lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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