I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
