She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Drake has all the answers
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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