Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
