Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You're a waste of cheezeits
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
