Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time i carry you out of a forest
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
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