We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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