shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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