Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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