Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
