doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
