I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
