love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
