And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
