I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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