I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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