Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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