hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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