The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I think im going to throw up on grandma
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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