how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
