i barfeds in our rink
i think i have two assholes
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
