Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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