words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
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