Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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