; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
North Korea, Best Korea!
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
