My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
