I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
