Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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