it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Brb crying the tears of my youth
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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