and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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