She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
