Texts From Last Night

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  (514): View more from Quebec

  I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.

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  (514): I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later. http://tfl.nu/cmn8
  Replies (6) Good night (2788) Bad night (828)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?

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  (306): Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'? http://tfl.nu/gncd
  Replies (14) Good night (4993) Bad night (1201)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet

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  (918): eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet http://tfl.nu/8959
  Replies (7) Good night (661) Bad night (4102)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.

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  (630): I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea. http://tfl.nu/9kka
  Replies (9) Good night (5062) Bad night (1253)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.

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  (706): just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was. http://tfl.nu/tfbm
  Replies (5) Good night (719) Bad night (1827)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.

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  (651): He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old. http://tfl.nu/87vs
  Replies (11) Good night (2118) Bad night (1350)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.

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  (419): I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation. http://tfl.nu/3fs0
  Replies (3) Good night (1783) Bad night (780)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.

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  (402): Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun. http://tfl.nu/qwzs
  Replies (3) Good night (1624) Bad night (848)
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  (510): View more from California

  Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.

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  (510): Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals. http://tfl.nu/vphu
  Replies (16) Good night (2521) Bad night (859)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  This is love.

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?

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  (413): This is love. (860): Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party? http://tfl.nu/8lic
  Replies (3) Good night (1515) Bad night (594)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.

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  (518): Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg. http://tfl.nu/k1xd
  Replies (10) Good night (1710) Bad night (573)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.

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  (647): I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does. http://tfl.nu/q7vv
  Replies (9) Good night (1538) Bad night (565)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Well for starters, her tits were hairy.

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  (541): Well for starters, her tits were hairy. http://tfl.nu/wo8e
  Replies (27) Good night (578) Bad night (3326)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.

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  (774): I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work. http://tfl.nu/gs7f
  Replies (3) Good night (478) Bad night (995)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him

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  (484): you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him http://tfl.nu/re5m
  Replies (1) Good night (970) Bad night (444)

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