In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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